They always talk about glass ceilings
But never about glass walls
Those invisible things
That keep you a part of the world
But only close enough to be there
Never close enough to touch
You can hear out
But no one can hear in
You can see the sky
Like so much freedom
But you’ll never be able
To jump high enough
To get out
The calm before the storm
Is chaos in and of itself
It brings with it a sense of inevitability
Before it’s even started to rain
There’s a twister forming inside your mind
I feel like more people have anxiety disordes than people in general think, and unfortunately, I am one of those people. I’m starting a series of posts that share what it’s like to deal with anxiety. This is hard, because I don’t like to feel vulnerable or embarassed, but my hopes are that someone suffering with something similar can know they are not alone.
The first thing that sucks about having anxiety is watching something on tv that, even though it’s completely irrational, makes you feel anxious. Usually it’s a situation that you suddenly imagine you were in. It could be people crawling through air ducks, or people lost in a forest, or even people in a crowded train car. These are things you avoid because they are triggers, and even though you are safe and sound in your living room, your breath has sped up and your stomach is now upset.
I often avoid going to movies for the same reason. Crowds and being stuck in one place don’t go over well with me, so it’s hard to keep it together when the explosions are loud and the action is intense.
It sounds silly, but the mind of an anxious person is an irrational one. Accepting that is one of the most difficult things someone can do.